


lighters and candy (i’ve been a fool)

by orphan_account



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Aged Down Characters, Aged up characters, Angst??, Fluff, Friends With Benefits, M/M, No Strings Attached, Parties, clubs, contemporary dance major! renjun, dance crews, drinking!!, drug use!!, fools to lovers, implications of sex!!, kissing!!, making out!!, mentions of sex!!, smoking!!, underground dance battles, urban dance major! jeno
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-09-03
Packaged: 2020-10-06 09:29:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20504723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Renjun’s life just took a drastic turn. He blinks. Once, twice, too many times, to finally wrap his head around what’s going on.





	lighters and candy (i’ve been a fool)

**Author's Note:**

> title from: strawberries & cigarettes by troye sivan  
loosely based off of a relationship i recently just got out of (& a few songs) :DD i’ll make it less crappy but idk how to do that without making it pretty cliche so i’m sorry in advance. 
> 
> ok so before you continue please note that there will be so many scenes of drinking, smoking, and drug use, i am in no way shape or form promoting those. there’s also a lot of going out to parties and clubs and kissing/making out, and mentions of sex. i don’t plan on writting smut though. 
> 
> SO PLEASE BE WARNED AND DO NOT CONTINUE IF YOU ARE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH ANY OF THE THINGS MENTIONED!!!!!!!!!
> 
> just to be clear: some of the older members have been aged down so they’re all attending the university BUT there’s also different year requirements for different majors. all of them are of legal age here that means chensung have been aged up a year or two.
> 
> this is a work of fiction that i based off of a part of my life and people i know. i am not saying that this is how the nct members are in the daily.
> 
> please no reposting on any other platfrom or translating without my permission.
> 
> muwah :*  
daniella .x
> 
> [find me here](https://twitter.com/hrjdoc) | [send me questions, opinions](https://curiouscat.me/butterballs?t=1567528668)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Renjun knew it was coming. He sees it happening, how Jeno kept his gaze on his lips, how Jeno started to inch closer while he tilts Renjun’s head back even more. But he wasn’t able to react quick to dodge it, not like he was even going to.

Renjun’s life just took a drastic turn.

It’s a wednesday night, the last thing he would’ve thought of doing is going out with his best friend since middle school, dorm mate, and bad decisions extraordinaire, Lee Donghyuck. He’d rather be spending his night going through today’s lesson in one of the uni’s empty dance rooms that they ever so kindly let students use even after school hours at night. Or he’d be busy doing homework, or talking to Chenle on the phone, or massaging Xiaojun’s tired wrists from playing instruments all day. 

Surely, going to a club is not in Renjun’s agenda. 

Heck, he’s never even been to one. He’s only been to house parties and Renjun for sure didn’t like those one bit, he only went for his friends. He liked to drink, yes, but he likes to drink in their dorm where they have to sneak alcohol in. He prefers the soft sound coming from the television and dancing to k-pop girl group songs with Donghyuck in their living room. Not the loud music blasting from the speakers, or the loud chatter, drunken singing, laughing, or grinding on the dancefloor. He liked the ambience of their own dorm where it’s just the two of them, or sometimes with Xiaojun and Chenle, talking their brains and hearts out, with the soft smell of whatever scented candle Hyuck decides to light. Not the hormonal teenagers sucking faces, and maybe even more, in all corners of the room, and the faint smell of sex, alcohol, weed and smoke. Renjun choked at least four times on the smoke in the air. He’s sure he lost fifty years of life from second hand smoke alone.

But that’s not the only thing he has to deal with tonight. 

You see, Renjun also just found out that Hyuck is part of a dance crew, since the beginning of their first year at SMU and they’re already halfway through their second year. No problem with that except that Donghyuck kept it from him for so long (_Really, that’s the thing you’re most concerned about when your best friend risks his safety for dancing?_) and that they battle underground where people place bets on them. It’s illegal, it’s literally gambling. But Renjun doesn’t dwell on it too much. At least it’s better than what Renjun imagined he was part of. He has assumed that Donghyuck is part of a gang or worse, the mob. You can’t blame him if he assumed the worst when Donghyuck disappears into the night and comes home reeking of sweat, alcohol, and smoke and dirty clothes, and not to mention, Donghyuck buying a new TV for their shared apartment and at least three new pairs of shoes that Renjun was sure Donghyuck couldn’t afford. Where else could he get fast money? 

Underground dance battles, apparently.

Donghyuck insisted on taking Renjun to tonight’s battle which Renjun strongly declined to but he’s weak for Donghyuck’s puppy eyes and offer to pay for this week’s groceries. What could go wrong right?

A lot of things went wrong tonight. 

First of all, the moment they stepped foot in the playground, as they like to call it (_Pretty corny if you ask me. Well it’s not your concern is it?_), he was introduced to a pack of 17 men, that looked like they jumped straight out of a magazine, who (fortunately) turned out to be his crew members. Renjun decides he’s going to have a few words with Donghyuck in private for not introducing him sooner. Renjun swears he’s seen some of those faces somewhere.

Second, just after their (very enthusiastic) introductions, the cops came to raid the place. Renjun was pulled by at least three hands as they race to the nearest window where they all skillfully hopped out off while Renjun was hastily thrown out of it by Johnny. He’s sure there’s going to be a bruise on his ribs. All of them ran at full speed leaving Renjun at the end of their strip tripping on his own foot. (_To hell with their stamina._)

Lastly, after their little marathon, tired is an understatement for Renjun. He sure is out of his mind when he starts laughing like a maniac and exclaiming that it was amazing when they’ve hidden themselves in a dark alley but regrets it soon after. (_Holy shit! That was amazing! Good, the night has just started kid_.)

They walked for another fifteen or so minutes to _Club 119, the hottest club in all of Seoul,_ as introduced by Mark. Renjun started to doubt Mark’s words when they enter, after they were greeted by a small old restaurant with greasy men but soon proven wrong when they make their way down the stairs in front of a velvet door with two bouncers guarding it. Renjun managed to enter after some small… complications.

“I.D?” The bouncer extends a hand out to him, making him halt. “A-actually I don’t have it on m-me.”

The last thing he wanted to do was show his fear to the bouncer because that will obviously blow his cover and will get him kicked out. Renjun is legal alright but it looks like the club doesn’t care for age but how cool you are. Renjun’s face looks so much like of a baby’s and a 90s pampered rich boy to look cool. 

“It’s good, he’s our new friend, … What’s your name again?” 

“Renjun.”

“_Ronjeon._” 

He purses his lips, wanting to protest but he decides not to. The guy’s helping him and he looks far too good anyways. 

“Thank you, …”

“Jaehyun.”

“Thank you, Jeremy.”

Renjun knew his name from earlier but a little petty comment won’t hurt.

That leads to right now at this very moment where Renjun is sandwiched between a guy named Ten, (_Seriously, of all numbers, why’d he have to choose the number ten to go by?_) who happily claimed himself to be Renjun’s guardian, and Donghyuck. Cans of beer and bottles of hard liquor littered the table with cups and shot glasses, with at least half of the group smoking cigarettes, some are on seated on each other’s laps in heated makeout sessions, it just made Renjun realize that he’s so out of place. 

Donghyuck is taking shots while Jaemin and Mark cheers him on. Ten is happily peppering his lover, Johnny, with kisses while they both take a hit on Taeyong’s weed that he rolled for the both of them. Taeyong as mentioned is currently doing shot guns with Jaehyun. Yuta and Sicheng disappeared into the bathroom awhile ago, Renjun isn’t dumb, he knows what they’re doing and he doesn’t even want to think about it anymore. Jisung, Yangyang, and Hendery are happily dancing on the dancefloor after claiming that they’re dance deprived after they were raided by the police just before their performance. Jungwoo is on top of Xuxi’s lap making out while Taeil watches the both of them, horrified, and occasionally jumping on a conversation with Doyoung and Kun. Doyoung is also flirting with Kun but the other’s pretty… dense. Even Renjun who met them just now knows Doyoung’s got the hots for him. There’s also this guy Jeno, that disappeared awhile ago that came back just now, sitting right across Renjun beside Jaemin. 

This is the first time Renjun has looked at Jeno properly tonight, despite the dim lighting, Renjun can tell Jeno’s no different from his greek gods of friends. He may even be the most handsome one in here if Renjun had to be honest or at least... Who fit his taste. Jeno’s eyes are half lidded as he brushes his blonde hair up, giving Renjun a good view of his face. Jeno’s face is flushed, Renjun first thought it might be from the alcohol but after seeing his disheveled clothes, at least four hickeys on his neck, and wet, swollen plump lips Renjun thinks different. Renjun tries so hard to look away after Jeno takes out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket. He rolls his eyes, _of course he smokes_. Renjun doesn’t have anything against people that smoke but he prefers them not to. If it was anyone he’s close with he would’ve put them on a chokehold, making them feel how it’ll be like in a few years time.But somehow, he couldn’t take his eyes off of Jeno when he places a stick in between his lips it and laughs at something Jaemin has said while his eyes disappear into crescents. He furrowed his eyebrows, lighting the stick sitting on his lips before he puffs the smoke out. 

Renjun doesn’t find people who smoke hot but right now, he can only make an exception and conclude that Jeno’s one of the hottest boys he’s ever seen that his mouth goes dry at the sight before him.

“HAPPY HOUR!” 

A female bartender shouts into one of the mics from the sound system, startling Renjun. The crowd, including their table cheers, he’s so lost but he cheers with them anyway just so that he doesn’t look like a complete loser. A bartender makes her way to their table, a pitcher of flavored alcohol in hand. He notices other bartenders going to different tables as well. 

“Mark! Mark! Mark!” Everyone in their table chants, confusing Renjun even more as he watches Mark tilt his head back opening his mouth while the bartender pours the alcoholic drink in for at least three seconds, and the others handing him a shot of vodka after. Renjun continues to stare in shock when the bartender moves to Donghyuck and everyone cheers again. 

“Your turn!” Ten says excitedly, pulling Renjun’s hair to tip his head back, making Renjun yelp in surprise. “He’s new! Give him 6 seconds!” Taeyong shouts through the loud music and cheers from the crowd and the bartender nods with a wink. 

Renjun was about to protest but Ten was quick to shut him up, pulling his hair more “Open up, big boy!” 

As soon as Renjun opens his mouth, a cold and bitter peach flavored gin fills his mouth, almost choking him but he’s quick to glug the alcohol down. Renjun feels it’s trickling down the sides of his mouth and chin down to his neck, making him feel disgusting but at the same time stimulated. He hears everyone count down and chant his name motivating him to drink and he’s never felt so good while downing a drink. 

Hyuck shoves a shot glass filled with raw vodka in his hand after he pulls his head back up. Choking, he downs it, and he’s never seen Hyuck so proud of him. Renjun retches continuously as it leaves a strip of burning sensation in his throat and warmth settles in his stomach, he coughs while the others continue the round. Ten and Hyuck patting his back while they laugh at Renjun’s state but Hyuck is kind enough to ask Renjun if he wanted to go to the bathroom every now and then. 

Renjun recovered a few minutes after everyone was done, he realizes that everyone but him, Donghyuck, and Mark are left in their booth. They all went to the dancefloor after some boost of the gin and Renjun’s more than thankful that he’s got room to lie down and breathe for a bit. His head was spinning and it’s not helping that the air is filled with smoke. 

“Don’t lie down, your head will hurt more.” Hyuck grabs his arm pulling him up while Renjun groans but let’s himself sit straight deciding to trust his experienced friend. “You can go,” Renjun slurs, feeling bad that his friend and his friend’s friend is babysitting him when all his other friends are enjoying on the dancefloor “I can manage. I’ll join you all in a bit when I sort myself out.” 

Hyuck looks at him then at Mark, conflicted and Renjun wiggles his eyebrows at him, nodding towards Mark who was looking at the others. Renjun smirks a _Go get your man_ smirk and Hyuck returns Renjun’s kind gesture with a smack on the head before huffing and standing, tugging Mark to join the others on the dancefloor. 

Renjun sighs, leaning his back against the chair, resting his head on it. He decides to close his eyes a bit to get his mind to rest but his plans were interrupted when the table gets pushed slightly with a loud noise, making some of the bottles resting on top of it fall. Renjun snaps his eyes open to see the oh-so-handsome Jeno. Mouth sucking on a girl’s tongue and hands underneath her miniskirt, hiking it up a bit. Renjun can see the girl’s underwear but he looks away, blushing, eyes landing on Jeno’s closed ones. He watches Jeno and his furrowed eyebrows as he works his tongue in the girl’s mouth. Pulling the girl in his lap, Jeno moves to work on sucking hickeys on her neck making her moan as she grinds down on Jeno. 

Renjun retches at the sight. Not wanting to be Jeno’s cockblock as nausea gets the best of him, he bolts out the booth and out the club to the empty street. He continues to gag and choke for a good five minutes, trying to fight the vomit that creeps it’s way up his throat but eventually gives in. 

The first time he throws up, he discards all the alcohol he drank earlier, second, third, fourth time, _ah shit it keeps on coming_. He throws up so many times that he couldn’t even count. Renjun sits on the curb, just beside his vomit, drooling. After awhile, a hand comes to rub his back. The kind passerby must’ve taken pity at Renjun’s disgusting state. 

“Let’s move you to a different place yeah?” The person speaks softly, rubbing both his hands on Renjun’s arms making him warm. Renjun jolts in surprise at the sudden contact. 

“C’mon, I’ll help you up. You have to lean on something or you’ll fall face flat on the ground.” 

Renjun didn’t want to go, especially with a stranger but he couldn’t find it in him to protest. The other was too kind and too warm it’s too hard to. And not to mention, he’s wasted. He nodded weakly, not being able to speak with his scratchy throat.

Renjun stumbles on his feet as he stands, the person grips Renjun’s sides tight to keep him steady and leads him to the front of the restobar, sitting Renjun down, he pushes him slightly so he’s back is resting against the wall. The other person sits indian style in front of Renjun on the ground, pulling out a handkerchief from his back pocket. 

“Let’s clean you up a bit.” He says as he watches the sweat drip from Renjun’s forehead and his saliva running down the corners of his mouth. He tilts Renjun’s face up a bit before wiping his face, neck, and mouth down.

Renjun manages to gain focus on the person in front of him, gasping dramatically, he exclaims, “You’re Jeno!” He looks at him wide eyed. 

“Yes, yes I am.” Jeno chuckles, as he brushes Renjun’s lip with his handkerchief one last time before setting it on his lap. 

“Why— Why are you here?”

“You ran out the club alone. If you get lost I was the last person with you, all the responsibility is going to be on me.” 

“The other girl was there too, so technically, the responsibility is going to be on the both of you.” 

“Fair point.” Jeno snickers, grabbing one of the two beer cans he set down before coming to Renjun’s aid. He holds it up to Renjun’s face tipping it slightly, asking him to drink from it. 

“You should drink something, I don’t have anything but beer with me so it’ll have to do.” 

Renjun takes the can and brings it up to his mouth only to gag at the scent and the thought of drinking more alcohol. He scrunched his face up, shoving the can back in Jeno’s hands. “I don’t wanna, it tastes bad. I’m going to throw it up again...” He trails miserably as he throws his head onto Jeno’s shoulder in front of him. 

“I know something that will make it taste better.” Jeno grunts, taking out a piece of his butterball candy that he likes to suck on when he’s drinking beer. He pushes Renjun slightly away from him just so that Renjun can see what he’s holding up but the other’s heads hangs lowly and lightly, swaying in all directions as he struggles to keep his head up like a baby. 

He rips the wrapper with his teeth, before holding the back of Renjun’s neck, thumb resting against the boy’s cheek. Jeno slides the butterball in Renjun’s slightly parted lips without struggle as it slips right in with the moisture from Renjun’s drool. 

Jeno rests Renjun’s head on the wall behind him to get him to drink beer again. “Suck on the candy before you drink, it helps with the taste.”

Renjun obeys, rolling the candy around inside his mouth that Jeno sees it popping from his cheek every now and then. He watches Renjun take a sip from the can and smiling in amusement when Renjun’s eyes widen and mouth form an ‘O’ shape after. “Woah, this tastes good!”

Renjun takes another swig filling his mouth before gulping it down. It hurt his throat but the enhanced taste of cheap beer from the candy tastes way too good to care for that. 

Jeno watches Renjun lick his lips, the butterball is poking out on his cheek. He takes the can of beer from Renjun’s grasp and drinks from it, eyes on Renjun’s glassy ones. “Hey! You have your own beer!” The drunk boy protests. 

“I gave you my last butterball, I usually can’t finish a can without them. It’d be a waste.” 

Renjun mumbled an apology, his already flushed cheeks and nose turns even more red and perhaps Jeno thought for the first time that night, Renjun’s cute. But too bad, he’s not anywhere near Jeno’s type. 

Renjun plays with the butterball in his mouth, making an embarrassing loud sucking noise when he got carried away. He takes the beer can from Jeno’s hand and drinks from it clumsily, spilling some even before it reaches his mouth. 

“Slow down a bit, you just threw up. You’re barely even sober.”

Jeno wipes the liquid dripping on Renjun’s chin making the other lean towards him until his heavy head falls on Jeno’s hard chest. Jeno chuckles lightly. He’s dealt with so many drunk people before but this one in particular is the only one he handled where he didn’t get annoyed. He even finds drunk Renjun cute. 

Jeno used his finger to tilt Renjun’s chin up, the other slowly opens his heavy eyelids to look at Jeno’s. Jeno looks straight at the other’s glassy ones, oddly not wanting to look away as if he’s captivated. Renjun feels no different. Renjun’s glassy eyes reflected the sky above them and the streetlights while Jeno’s were nothing but dark. 

“Do you want another sip of beer?” 

Renjun breaks the silence, it was only then that they both realized how close they are after Jeno feels Renjun’s breath on his face. “I don’t think I can stomach it without the candy.” 

Jeno watches Renjun swipe his tongue on his bottom lip, the butterball still poking out from his cheek. Now he finds himself staring at the boy’s glossy lips unknowingly tilting Renjun’s head back even more. 

“But I think I know how to get a taste.”

Renjun knew it was coming. He sees it happening, how Jeno kept his gaze on his lips, how Jeno started to inch closer while he tilts Renjun’s head back even more. But he wasn’t able to react quick to dodge it, not like he was even going to.

Jeno takes Renjun’s soft lips in his, kissing him slowly and softly, not like how he was kissing the girl in the club just a while ago. Renjun didn’t even think for a second before kissing him back, giving in as soon as Jeno sucks on his bottom lip. He knows he’s got the excuse that he’s drunk when he starts to regret it tomorrow but there’s still that want lingering in the back of his head.

Renjun was slowly but surely drowning in Jeno’s taste. Cigarettes, butterballs, and a hint of the bitter alcohol he was drinking earlier that night, he was getting lightheaded as their kiss progresses. Renjun whimpers when Jeno pulls away but that turned into a gasp and a silent moan when he feels Jeno’s open mouth kisses on his neck. 

“Jeno…” He hisses when he feels Jeno’s teeth digging into the skin on his neck just below his jaw, sucking to leave a very noticeable mark. Jeno pulls away slightly to see the purplish red bruise he left, feeling satisfied, he kisses it softly before returning to kiss Renjun’s pouting lips. 

Renjun doesn’t remember what happened next, falling deeply in the trance Lee Jeno is. 

————

Renjun’s eyes shot open, the sound of his alarm waking him up from his sleep.

He reaches out to his phone that was neatly placed on the bed side table and realizes that he’s burrito wrapped in his blanket. He struggles, but wiggles out of it, falling onto the floor and finding himself half naked. And then the memories of last night comes flooding in. Hyuck’s revelation, the playground, the raid, the club, vomiting, beer, butterball candies, cigarettes, … _Lee Jeno_. 

Renjun jumps from his position on the floor and backtracks. He stands at the end of his bed, where his dirty clothes messily lies, thinking of all the things he could’ve done to only be in his boxer shorts, ignoring the faint taste of alcohol and vomit at the back of his throat. One thought comes after the other, the fear of having lost his virginity drunk and _how the fuck am I not hungover right now?_

But the last one isn’t important right now is it?

He gasps, dashing out his room and the living room to check his body on the full size mirror Hyuck conveniently bought. He looks at his reflection, hands trembling when he reaches up to touch hickeys littering his neck and collarbone. He pats his whole body down to search for any discomfort or more signs of them…doing it. He even dared to feel his ass and that’s when Hyuck decides to end his friend’s suffering.

“Don’t worry, you’re still very much a virgin.” 

Renjun spins to see Hyuck looking right at him from the kitchen counter sipping on his hot chocolate trying to hide his grin. 

“What happened?” Renjun barely lets out after a few seconds of silence that only made him more nervous. 

“Well, from the looks of it, you two obviously had a great time.” Hyuck snorts and Renjun looks at him, pleading.

“Alright, alright. Nothing happened.” He smirks, playful eyes staring straight at Renjun and he somehow feels like he shouldn’t be relieved just yet.

“Only you threw up on him while he was sucking on your neck.” And with that, Renjun falls on the floor.

“I’m ruined!” He exclaims dramatically, throwing his hands up in the air, letting out pitiful pathetic sounds while Hyuck laughs loudly at him. “Chill. At least you didn’t throw up in his mouth.” He laughs even more.

“Here drink this for your headache.” Hyuck hands him a pain reliever and a cup of water after recovering from his laughter.

“I’m not even hungover, I just feel tired.”

“Huh? I guess throwing up all over Jeno helped.” 

“Shut the fuck up!” 

—

“Hyuck! Injun!”

Renjun jumps and cringes at the sound of his nickname coming from a new but familiar voice. Hyuck pulls Renjun to a different direction from where they were walking. Halting once they were infront of 2 circle cafeteria tables with the boys he was with the night before. 

Surprised, he scans the table trying to name and count everyone on the table. That’s why they were all familiar, they all go to the same university. Renjun’s eyes land on Jeno’s blank ones and hastily, he looks away, cursing himself quietly and pulling his hood up slightly to his neck, covering the marks the boy left there.

“Sit with us! We’ve been asking Hyuck to sit with us but he never does because he didn’t want to ditch you.” Jaemin says excitedly, patting down the space on the bench for the two of them to sit. 

Before Renjun can reject, Hyuck pushes him onto the seat beside Xuxi while he sits beside Jaemin. They all exchange small smiles and greetings before they start a proper conversation. 

He learns that not everyone in their group dances (specifically Taeil, Doyoung, Kun, Sicheng, and Jungwoo, they were pulled into the friend group naturally since some of them are dating the members or they’re family members, or they’ve been friends way before the crew was even formed) and some of them aren't even part of the performing arts program of the school even if their university is most known for it. 

Renjun soon tunes out of the conversation, he doesn’t mean to but he feels a bit weird now that he’s finally able to see them in the daylight in all their glory. If they looked great at night they certainly look more during the day. Renjun’s sure all of them are glowing despite getting wasted just a few hours ago. 

“I saw you and Jeno last night.” Yangyang, Renjun remembers his name, whisper yells while he leans towards him, ignoring Xuxi’s presence in the middle. _So much for a greeting_. “How was it?”

Blood creeps up from Renjun’s neck to the tips of his ears. How is he supposed to reply? _Did you enjoy the show? It was great? Jeno’s a great kisser?_ So instead, he tightens his hood up a bit to cover not only his face but his neck. 

“Yang!” Xuxi hits Yangyang’s head before turning to Renjun with a goofy, knowing smile “Sorry, you probably want to keep your business private but everyone saw last night, just so you know.” 

Renjun feels like launching himself to the moon and never coming back. He doesn’t know if he’s embarrassed because everyone saw the two of them making out or because he puked on Jeno. It’s really a mixture of both. 

Renjun feels eyes looking at him, he just knows it. It’s that unsettling feeling creeping up his spine that sends him goosebumps but he mindlessly chews on the straw of his strawberry milk while he glances up to see Jeno looking smug while they lock eyes. 

Renjun’s heart is suddenly going feral inside his chest.

“Psst!” 

He thanks the gods when he sees Chenle and Xiaojun with their trays in hand, eyebrows raised as they stand across the table. His eyes widens, completely feeling bad about forgetting his other friends that they always sit with during lunch. He was about to excuse himself but Kun beats him to it.

“Chenle? Xiaojun? What are you doing here?” Kun questions the two boys and suddenly all 19 pairs of eyes are on them. Renjun looks at Kun with raised brows and so does the others “Oh, they’re my juniors. We share some classes and activities together.” He answers the unspoken question and everyone nods. They look back at the two boys and Renjun feels incredibly bad after seeing them flinch at all the eyes staring at them. Hyuck must’ve also felt bad because he answered for them.

“They’re Renjun and I’s friends. We usually sit together during lunch. So if you'll excuse us…” Hyuck slowly grabs his bag and Renjun does the same, relieved, picking up their unfinished food before Taeyong stops them. “They can sit with us here.” 

“As long as they’re cool with it.” Johnny shrugs. 

“Hyuck’s friends are our friends too. Besides, Kun knows them.” 

That’s how the 2 circle tables ended up being too crowded for the group of 21. Some took this opportunity to sit on each other's laps and some even sat on the table itself, earning disapproving looks from the school’s staff. While Renjun finds comfort in the confines of his hoodie.

—

Renjun blinks. Once, twice, too many times, to finally wrap his head around what’s going on. 

He’s pushed up against one of the corners of the locker room at the end of the hallway that had the notorious image as the den of hormonal dance majors. He’s only heard so much of this place, of who went, how long they were in, that Renjun never imagined nor dared to even go near here. 

Jeno had him pinned against the wall, Jeno’s arm stretched on the side of Renjun’s head, while his free hand has Renjun’s waist pushed on the wall, trapping him. Jeno looks at him with dark eyes and Renjun couldn’t help but feel weak at his stare. His eyes shake in fear thinking of all the reasons why Jeno wanted to have a word with him in private.

_Maybe he’s mad because I vomited on him. Or maybe he’s mad because he missed his chance with the girl last night. Or maybe because I took his last butterball? No, I don’t think he’s that shallow._

_… Maybe because he regrets last night and wants to threaten me._

_Makes sense._

“Jen—“ 

He barely even started his apology when he’s cut off by Jeno’s lips on his. Making him yelp in surprise while Jeno exhales hard through his nose. Jeno kisses him fast and rough unlike the night before, but Renjun accepts him, closing his eyes slowly and kissing him back just as much. Jeno’s tongue poked on Renjun’s parted lips, opening them to explore more of Renjun. Their tongues molding perfectly. 

Jeno pushes his heavy body on Renjun, crushing him between the wall but Renjun loves the coldness of the tiled wall and the warmth of Jeno’s body crushing him, knocking him out of his breath. The hand on his waist travel up inside his hoodie, rubbing circles on the soft milky skin, pinching it slightly, making him whine into Jeno’s lips. Renjun finds something to do with his hands, tugging and pulling on Jeno’s hair, making Jeno groan and press harder on him.

Jeno backs up, not separating their lips, he pulls Renjun with both his arms on his waist, sitting on the nearest bench he can feel. He pulls Renjun onto his lap to have the other straddle him. With their position, Renjun finds it easier to deepen the kiss, moaning after getting to taste Jeno more and more.

_Cigarettes and butterball candies._

Renjun almost whines when Jeno pulls away but he couldn’t do that when the other was staring at him with such beautiful glassy eyes, disheveled hair, and swollen wet lips. He looks so… hot. He trembles when Jeno attaches his lips onto his neck, placing feathery kisses on the marks he so gladly left the night before. 

Renjun moans, quiet enough so that no one beyond the door can hear but loud enough only for Jeno. That seemed to fuel him up because his once soft kisses turned into harsh, almost painful ones. Leaving marks mercilessly on Renjun’s neck. Renjun knows he won’t be able to cover them up but that’s the least of his concerns right now. He tugs on Jeno’s hair, separating his lips from his neck, and leans down to crash his own on Jeno’s. Jeno willingly kisses him back, letting Renjun do whatever he wants with his lips. 

They kiss like that for what seemed like hours (really only 20 minutes at most) until Renjun remembers they have class. He pulls away, whispering _“We have to go.”_ against Jeno’s lips, Jeno only nods putting Renjun down too quickly that Renjun was almost hurt at the boy’s sudden change. 

“Don’t cover your neck. I like it like that.” Jeno points at Renjun’s bruised neck, and Renjun feels a blush creeping up and a shiver down his spine “Sorry… For vomiting on you last night.” He changes the subject, an attempt to hide the blush. _Couldn’t you have thought of something better?_ He hits himself internally. 

Jeno raised an amused eyebrow at him, chuckling before stepping forward, pecking Renjun’s lips before walking out of the locker room. 

Leaving a dazed and breathless Renjun in the cold confines of the dimly lit locker room. 

—

“Are you sure you don’t want to go out? Ten was kind of looking forward on seeing you tonight.” 

Renjun raised an eyebrow at him while he plops down on the couch of their dorm, having just arrived from Xiaojun and Chenle’s dorm where he massaged Xiaojun’s wrist while Chenle played some piano resulting to him taking a short nap. 

“Tell Ten we can see each other next time. I’m just not in the mood tonight.” He turns on their TV, pulling out Netflix and scrolling through the shows. “Are you okay Renjun?” 

“Why wouldn’t I be?” 

It’s now Hyuck’s turn to raise an eyebrow at him because he turned on Brooklyn Nine-Nine unconsciously. The show he watches when he’s feeling a bit upset that he needs something to make him crack a smile. 

“Is it because of earlier?” 

“What do you mean?”

“Renjun. Word spread out like wildfire. Everyone knows.” Now Renjun is now more worries than curious. _What does he mean?_

“What?”

“The locker room Renjun. So many people saw Jeno walk out followed by _‘Sophomore top contemporary dance major Huang Renjun’_.” Hyuck quotes, sitting on the couch beside him and looking at him cautiously. 

“Oh.”

Honestly, that’s the least of his concerns. About damn time something like that about him gets out, instead of news about how great of a student he is or how his parents manipulate his grades. There’s no in between. Renjun doesn’t care if it ruins his image more in their university. It’s got too many people sucking up to him and hating him and he hates it. But other than that, he doesn’t see the problem with that at all. Almost everyday there’s a new gossip about a pair in the locker room. Jeno and him just so happened to be it today. 

“Don’t worry though. I talked to Taeyong about it and he’s got it covered. I don’t know what he did or how he did it but he got people to shut up about it.”

“Hyuck, I really don’t mind. It’s just that—“

He breathes.

“It’s Jeno.”

He admits without a second thought. He’s spent the entire day thinking about Jeno that he’s exhausted. 

There’s nothing to think about except there’s a lot. Whatever that was, what they did, it’s nothing… But why did it happen? The first time they were both drunk, but that isn’t much of an excuse is it? They both took advantage of each other's drunken state for their own desires. The second time, leaves Renjun confused. Why did Jeno do that, why did the very sober Renjun let him? Why did Renjun displayed the hickeys Jeno left when any other day he’d create a fuss about it. They haven’t even had a proper sober conversation except for the small exchange in the locker rooms but that barely did anything.

What exactly are they? Now that they’ve made out, two times to be exact… What does that make them? Renjun doesn’t know if he wants to be in a relationship, not now at least. And he for sure doesn’t like Jeno like that. He barely even knows him. 

What does Jeno think of him?

“Renjun… How do I say this?”

For the first time, Hyuck hesitates to say something. Renjun already has a clue of what he’s going to say and honestly, he doesn’t know what to feel about it. 

“He, Jeno, he plays around a lot. Like this. Exactly what he’s doing with you.” 

“I figured.” Renjun snorts.

“But I’m not saying that you should stay away from him or not like him. Don’t fall into his trap. Just… Take care of yourself yeah? Know your limits because Jeno for sure doesn’t know his. It’s nice to spice up your life like this and I get that.” The other explains frantically when a frown shows up on Renjun’s face. 

“Don’t worry Hyuck. I don’t even like him like that and I don’t think I ever will.” He threw his best friend the most genuine and reassuring smile he can muster but why doesn’t it feel right?

“Sure.” Hyuck rolls his eyes. Hyuck knows Renjun too well that he knows Renjun’s doubting his own sentence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that’s all for now :P
> 
> thank you for reading <333  
daniella .x
> 
> [find me here](https://twitter.com/hrjdoc) | [send me questions, opinions](https://curiouscat.me/butterballs?t=1567528668)


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